6 weeks earlier, I had had a vasectomy, and as part of the process, you have to send samples away to confirm that you have attained the legendary status of being a Jaffa (seedless!)
My Mrs took the kids to school, and I went into the kitchen and pulled one of my fave VHS cassettes off the top of the kitchen cupboard and proceeded to persuade a sample into the test tube. This eventually happened and then the sample was corked, wrapped in bubble wrap and put into a jiffy bag marked "Royal Liverpool Hospital Pathology Department".
I walked round the corner to our local post office, where there was quite a queue of people in front of me. Eventually I made it to the front of the line with a dozen or so people now queued behind me.
I pushed the package under the window and the postwoman said to me "What is it?",
"A sperm sample", I replied
"No", she said, "First or Second Class??"
The line of people behind me burst into hysterical laughter and I felt the blood rushing into my cheeks. I paid the postage and left hurridly, and can honestly say, that to this day, I have never been in there since!!!
