well, I finally sat through SAW II...
*WARNING! THESE SPOILERS MIGHT SPOIL YOUR LIFE!*
What a greatly entertaining and ridiculous film!
My comments are directed at those who've seen the film, so don't bother reading on if you haven't!
...
I was prepared to judge it WORTHLESS after the first few scenes, but it turned out so entertaining towards the end that I couldn't resist actually
enjoying some of the worst dialogue - and least credible plot development - in cinema history.
Now, i won't reiterate what I already said about the first film. Let's just say many of the things that made the first film interesting are missing from this piece, like the decent actors (okay, half-decent), or the surprise element of not knowing what's going on.
Secondly, some of the most boring things from SAW are back again: dolls, anyone?
This time, most of the actors are extras, even the ones that supposedly matter, like the Cop's ex-partner, or nearly everybody inside the house. Some of them die immediately, but even the ones that survive are little beyond caricatures of unimaginative horror flicks: we got the hysterical girl, the macho man, the token black guy, the restless ugly dude who is killed off immediately, the mysterious experienced woman, the bad cop (= a bad father!), the ex-partner of that cop (with whom that cop has a strained, if affectionate, relationship), the emotionally distant son of that same cop (Father: "Fine! Go!" - son: "Ugh. Dad...") ... And then a horde of nameless police force, of course.
Luckily the junkie girl from the first film is back, and she saves the show as far as I'm concerned, gotta adore her.
Well, you see, I got to adore
somebody, since I definitely couldn't adore any of the other actors - although, to be fair, the cancer patient has some obvious charm, even if his character speaks like any other serial killer story in history, and has the same "calm" and ridiculous amount of self-confidence. The cop, played by Donnie Wahlberg, is set up as a worthless father and a failure in life, he has no soul and I couldn't care less if he loves his son or not. His ex-partner has no place in the film. The son himself is a loser and doesn't have the aura of "innocence" that a victimized person should have.
Here are some clichéd exchanges that only professionally untalented script writers could come up:
Mentally Disturbed Cop to his Beautiful Ex-Partner: "You know - you and that doll have something in common: you both like
playing games."
Macho Man to Hysterical Girl: "Look who's talking - the only door
you know how to open is between your legs!"
Now, I'll say it right away: I enjoyed the last 30 minutes of the film tremendously, and the conclusion WAS sufficiently surprising and fitting to give me a chuckle.
But there's no way any of the story made any sense!
Why did the hired killer have to die, and why was he such a wimp in the end? Why did they come up with this RIDICULOUSLY ELABORATE GAME to catch the cop, relying on the infinitely remote possibility that the cop would end in that one room at the end? Why did the junkie invite that bastard into her house in the first place, and why did she turn psycho? Why didn't anybody notice and stop the cop and the killer from leaving the crime scene? Why does any of this make sense?
Well, OK, so I enjoyed when I didn't care about these things, but I got to point out that bad dialogue is bad for your brain: It starts melting away and you're left with nothing but decrepit brain cells by the end of this 90 minutes. Then who's laughing? You, or that stupid doll?
Don't get me wrong: This film does give you a RUSH, but the same effect can be achieved by sniffing glue.
Haha, yea: 6/10.
