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Posted: Thu Sep 29, 2005 2:04 pm
by Willsy
Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by
saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed."

"OH NO!" the president exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as the
president sits, head in hands.

Finally, president looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"

Posted: Thu Sep 29, 2005 2:16 pm
by memly
Woah, I'm seeing double...

Posted: Thu Sep 29, 2005 2:16 pm
by Acid Gaz
Willsy - I thiink I've heard that one before... :roll:

Posted: Thu Sep 29, 2005 3:08 pm
by davemacfrombath
Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He concludes by saying: "We must get out of of Iraq - we've already lost 3 gazillion men"

"And?" the president asks nonchalently. "So what?"

His staff sits stunned at this lack of emotion, nervously watching as the president sits, chuckling as he watches Tom and Jerry on TV.

Finally, president looks up and asks, "Where is Gazil, exactly?"

Posted: Fri Sep 30, 2005 12:51 pm
by Dollydagger
:roll :roll :roll :roll :roll

Very deftly done Mr Mac!

Posted: Fri Sep 30, 2005 2:12 pm
by davemacfrombath
Flattery will get you everywhere...

Posted: Fri Sep 30, 2005 2:17 pm
by Willsy
Acid Gaz wrote:Willsy - I thiink I've heard that one before... :roll:
ooops! Well i did go through the post first and didnt see it.....sorry bud! :D

Posted: Fri Sep 30, 2005 2:32 pm
by memly
What kind of key can open any locks?

A pi-key.

Posted: Fri Sep 30, 2005 2:39 pm
by davemacfrombath
ho ho. Try explaining THAT to the non-Brits...

Posted: Fri Sep 30, 2005 2:43 pm
by Willsy
memly wrote:What kind of key can open any locks?

A pi-key.
whats a pi-key then?

Posted: Fri Sep 30, 2005 2:56 pm
by memly
Come on mate, you know what a Pikey is....

"daaags, do ya like daaags"

Theres enough of them in Andover...

(still not recovered from the weekend eh?).

Posted: Sat Oct 01, 2005 12:31 pm
by Timbob
davemacfrombath wrote:ho ho. Try explaining THAT to the non-Brits...
it took me a while.
luckily i saw snatch.

Posted: Sun Oct 02, 2005 2:09 pm
by davemacfrombath
So, I was wandering around the market in Cannibalmusicland and came across a stall selling human brains. Intruiged, I moved in for a closer look and saw 3 plates of brains.

The first plate was labelled Orbitalfan brains, 5 gold per kilo.
Another plate was labelled Lemonjellyfan brains, 10 gold per kilo.
The last plate was labelled Prodigyfan brains, 100 gold per kilo.

Naturally I was a bit disgruntled that Orbitalfan brains were so cheap so I asked why Prodigyfan brains were so bloody expensive.

'Oh well, it's obvious,' said the stallholder, 'have you got any fucking idea how many prodigyfans it takes to make a whole kilo of brains?!'

Posted: Mon Oct 03, 2005 9:44 am
by Loopz
Kate Moss met Jeremy Clarkson at a celeb party recently, unsure who he was, she asked 'so what do you do for a living?'

He replied 'Top Gear'

'4 grams please' said Kate

Posted: Mon Oct 03, 2005 7:47 pm
by little twin star
hahahahaha